"We knew it would happen," he finally responds, not sure why he said it.
"It's still hard to take." They aren't looking at each other, just analyzing the screens. "Now it's up to us. And the people in the barracks."
"That's a good thing," Thomas says.
"I almost feel as sorry for them as I do for the Gladers. Almost."
Thomas wonders what this means as his younger dream version clears his throat. "Do you think we've learned enough? Do you really think we can pull this off with all the original Creators dead?"
"We have to, Tom." Teresa steps over to him and grabs his hand. He looks down at her but he can't read her expression. "Everything's in place. We have a year to train the replacements and get ready."
"But it's not right. How can we ask them to―"
Teresa rolls her eyes and squeezes his hand so hard it hurts. "They know what they're getting into. No more talking like that."
"Yeah." Somehow Thomas knows this version of himself in the vision he's seeing feels dead inside. His words mean nothing. "All that matters now are the patterns. The killzone. Nothing else."
Teresa nodded. "No matter how many die or get hurt. If the Variables don't work, they'll end up the same anyway. Everyone will."
"The patterns," Thomas says.
Teresa squeezes his hand. "The patterns."
When he woke up, the light dimming to a dull gray as the sun sank to a horizon he couldn't see, Harriet and Sonya were sitting just a few feet from him. Both staring at him strangely.
"Good evening," he said with false enthusiasm, the troubling dream still fresh in his mind. "Can I help you ladies?"
"We want to know what you know," Harriet said quietly.
The lingering fog of sleep quickly vanished. "Why should I help you?" He wanted to sit and think about what he'd dreamed, but he knew something had changed―he could see it in Harriet's gaze―and he couldn't pass up the chance to save himself.
"I don't think you have much choice," Harriet said. "But if you share whatever you've learned or figured out, maybe we can help you."
Thomas looked around for Teresa but couldn't see her. "Where is―"
Sonya interrupted him. "She said she wanted to scout the area to see if your friends followed us. Been gone for about an hour."
In his mind, Thomas could see the Teresa of his dream. Watching those screens, talking about dead Creators and the killzone. Talking about patterns. How did it all fit together?
"Forget how to talk?"
His eyes focused on Sonya. "No, um ... does this mean you guys are having second thoughts about killing me?" The words sounded stupid to him, and he wondered how many people in the history of the world had ever asked a question like that.
Harriet smirked. "Don't go jumping to conclusions. And don't think we've gone all righteous. Let's just say we have our doubts and want to talk―but your odds are slim."
Sonya picked up her line of thought. "The smartest thing right now seems to be to do what we were told. There are a lot more of us than you. I mean, come on. If it was your decision, what would you do?"
"Pretty sure I'd choose the option of not killing myself."
"Don't be a jerk. This isn't funny. If you could choose, and the two options were you die or all of us die, which one would you pick? This is all about you or us."
Her face showed she was very serious, and the question hit Thomas like a thump to his chest. She was right, on some level. If that really would happen―they'd all die if they didn't get rid of him―then how could he expect them not to do it?
"You gonna answer?" Sonya pushed.
"I'm thinking." He paused, wiped some sweat off his forehead. Once again, the dream tried to creep to the front of his mind and he had to push it back. "Okay, I'm being honest here. I promise. If I were in your shoes, I'd choose not to kill me."
Harriet rolled her eyes. "Easy for you to say, since it's your life on the line."
"It's not just that. I think it's some kind of test and maybe you're not really supposed to do it." Thomas's heartbeat picked up―he really did mean what he said, but he doubted they'd believe him even if he tried to explain it. "Maybe we should share what we know, figure something out."
Harriet and Sonya exchanged a long look.
Sonya finally nodded; then Harriet said, "We've had our doubts about this whole thing from the beginning. Something about it isn't right. So yeah, you better talk. But let us get everybody over here first." They stood up to go rouse the others.
"Hurry, then," Thomas said, wondering if he really did have a chance to get out of this mess. "We better do this before Teresa gets back."
CHAPTER 48
It didn't take long for them to gather everyone―Thomas figured the intrigue of hearing what the dead-guy-walking had to say was just too good to pass up. The girls stood in a tight group in front of him; he remained tied to the ugly, lifeless tree.
"All right," Harriet said. "You talk first, then we will."
Thomas nodded and cleared his throat. He began talking even though he hadn't totally planned what to say yet.
"All I know about your group is what I learned from Aris. And it seems like we all went through pretty much the same thing inside the Maze. But since we escaped, lots of things have been different. And I'm not sure what you know about WICKED."
Sonya cut in. "Not much."
This encouraged Thomas, made him feel like he had an advantage. And it seemed a big mistake for Sonya to have admitted what she did. "Well, I've learned a lot about them. All of us are special in some way―we're being tested or something because they have plans for us." He paused then, but no one showed much of a reaction, so he went on.
"A lot of the things they're doing to us don't make sense because they're just part of the trials―what WICKED calls the Variables. Seeing how we react in certain situations. I don't understand all of it, not even close, but I think this whole thing about killing me is just another layer. Or another lie. So ... I think this is just another Variable to see what we'll all do."
"In other words," Harriet said, "you want us to risk our lives because of this brilliant deduction."
"Don't you see? Killing me has no point. Maybe it's a test for you, I don't know. But I do know that I can help you if I'm alive, not if I'm dead."
"Or," Harriet replied, "we're being tested to see if we have the guts to kill our competitors' leader. Isn't that the whole point? See which group succeeds? Weed out the weak and leave the strong?"
"I haven't even been the leader―Minho has." Thomas shook his head adamantly. "No, think about this. How are you showing any strength by killing me? I'm way outnumbered and you have all these weapons. How does that prove who's stronger?"
"Then what does it have to do with?" a girl from the back called out.
Thomas paused, choosing his words carefully. "I think it's a test to see if you'll think for yourself, change plans, make rational decisions. And the more of us there are, the better odds we have of making it to the safe haven. Killing me makes no sense, does no one any good. You've proven any power you needed to by capturing me. Show them you won't blindly take it all the way."
He stopped, relaxed back against the tree. He couldn't think of anything else. It was up to them now. He'd given it his best shot.
"Interesting stuff," Sonya said. "Sounds a lot like something a person who's desperate not to die would say."
Thomas shrugged. "I really feel like it's the truth. I think that if you kill me, you'll have failed the real test WICKED is throwing at you."
"Yeah, I bet you think that," Harriet said. She stood up. "Look, to be honest, we've been thinking the same types of things. But we wanted to see what you had to say. Sun should be down soon, and I'm sure Teresa will be back any minute. We'll talk about it when she gets here."
Thomas spoke up quickly, worried that Teresa wouldn't be swayed. "No! I mean, she's the one who seems the most gung ho about killing me." He said this even though deep down he hoped he didn't mean it. As badly as she'd treated him, surely she wasn't serious about taking it all the way to murder. "I think you guys should make the decision."
"Calm down," Harriet said, a half-smile on her face. "If we decide not to kill you, there's nothing she can freaking do about it. But if we ..." She stopped, a strange look flashing across her face. Was she worried she'd said too much? "We'll figure it out."
Thomas tried not to show his relief. He might have appealed to their pride a little bit, but he tried not to let his hopes get too high.
Thomas watched as the girls gathered their belongings and packed them into backpacks―Where'd they get those? he wondered―readying for the night's journey, to wherever that might be. Murmurs and whispers of conversation floated through the air as people kept glancing his way, obviously discussing what he'd said.
The darkness grew deeper and deeper, and Teresa finally appeared from the direction they'd come in earlier that day. She noticed right away that something was different, probably by the way everyone kept looking between her and Thomas.
"What?" she asked, the same hard look on her face she'd worn since the day before.
It was Harriet who answered. "We need to talk."
Teresa looked confused, but went to the far side of the recess in the cliff with the rest of the group. Furious whispers immediately filled the air, but Thomas couldn't make out a word anybody said. His stomach clenched in anticipation of the verdict.
From where he stood he could see that the conversation had started to get passionate, and Teresa looked as riled up as anyone. He watched her expression intensify as she tried to make some point. It seemed like it was her against the rest of them, which made Thomas very nervous.
Finally, just as nightfall was almost complete, Teresa turned, stomped from the group of girls, and started walking away from the camp, heading north. She had her spear slung over one shoulder, a backpack over the other. Thomas watched her go until she disappeared between the narrow walls of the Pass.
He glanced back at the group, many of whom looked relieved, and Harriet came walking over. Without saying a word, she knelt down and untied the rope securing him to the tree.
"Well?" Thomas finally asked. "Did you guys decide anything?"
Harriet didn't answer until she'd completely freed him; then she sat back on her heels and looked at him, her dark eyes reflecting the faint light of the stars and moon. "It's your lucky day. We decided not to kill your puny butt after all. It can't be a coincidence that we've all been thinking the same things deep down."
Thomas didn't feel the expected rush of relief. In that moment he realized that he'd known that was what they would decide all along.
"But I tell you what," Harriet said as she stood up, holding a hand out to help him do the same. "Teresa does not like you. I'd watch my back around her if I were you."
Thomas let Harriet pull him up, confusion and hurt warring for dominance inside him.
Teresa really did want him dead.
CHAPTER 49
Thomas was quiet as he ate with Group B and prepared to leave. Soon they started making their way through the dark pass of the mountains, heading for the safe haven that was supposed to wait on the other side. It felt odd to suddenly be friendly with these people after what they'd done to him, but they acted like nothing unusual had ever happened. They treated him like, well, like one of the girls.
But he did keep his distance a little, hanging toward the back, wondering if he could fully trust their change of heart about him. What was he supposed to do? Even if Harriet and the others let him leave, should he try to find his own group, Minho and Newt and everyone else? He desperately wanted to be with his friends and Brenda again. But he knew time was running out, and he had no food or water to make it on his own. He had to hope they'd find their own way to the safe haven.
So he kept walking, staying close to Group B but not too close.
A couple of hours went by, nothing but tall cliffs of stone and the crunching of dirt and rock under his feet to keep him company. It felt good to move again, to stretch his legs and muscles. The deadline was fast approaching, though. And who knew what obstacle might spring up next? Or had the girls planned something else for him? He thought a lot about the dreams he'd been having, but still couldn't put enough together to truly understand what was going on.
Harriet drifted back until the two of them were walking side by side.
"Sorry we dragged you through the desert in a bag," she said. He couldn't see her face in the dimming light very well, but he imagined a smirk there.
"Oh, no problem, it felt good to take a load off for a while." Thomas knew he had to play the part, show some humor. He couldn't trust the girls completely yet, but he had no other options.
She laughed, a sound that put him at ease a bit. "Yeah, well, the man from WICKED gave us very specific instructions about you. But it was Teresa who got all obsessed about it. Almost like killing you was her idea."
This dug at Thomas, but he finally had a chance to learn some things and he wasn't going to let that go. "Did the guy have a white suit and kind of look like a rat turned human?"
"Yeah," she said without hesitating. "Same guy who talked to your group?"
