I tried giving her the finger, but accidentally gave her two.
Ryu wasn’t giving up, asking Nyx what Peter had been working on when he died.
“Oh,” she said, sweetly. “I don’t know. I’d loaned him to the Alfar. They asked to borrow his services and I’m nothing if not helpful.”
“What would the Alfar want with Jakes?” Ryu’s voice betrayed his concern.
“Jarl has Orin convinced that there’s something to studying halflings, and Jakes could identify halflings.” Nyx shrugged. “Some of the higher-ups are growing concerned about our falling birth rates—they’ve apparently hit an all new low. I think that just means more opportunities for the rest of us, but some still bear a sentimental attachment to the young.”
“So, Jakes wasn’t working for you, he was working for the Alfar,” Ryu clarified, and Nyx nodded.
“I don’t know what they were doing, but yes. That’s my story.” She smiled sweetly. “And I’m sticking to it.”
Ryu frowned. I could tell he was disturbed by what Nyx had just told him. The female vampire stretched languidly, her muscles rippling under the tight fabric of her clothes.
“Well, it’s my time to hunt,” she said. “There’s a hillbilly bar an hour from here that I enjoy terrorizing, if you want to leave your baby doll and come along for a real meal. Or maybe we could compromise and chase her around the Compound. She doesn’t look very fast, but we could give her a head start.”
Ryu shook his head. “You’ll never change, Nyx. I realize that, even if no one else does.” He walked away from her, toward me. The ambrosia salad was about halfway converted back to brain matter, and it recognized that Nyx had been completely serious about hunting me. Which it didn’t appreciate.
Ryu took my free hand, the one without the underwear and shoes, and led me back toward the gate.
“Is that a no, cousin?” Nyx called out behind us. “Well, good night anyway. Enjoy your little mongrel girlfriend. Although how she can satisfy you is beyond me. I guess some of us have more sophisticated palates than others.”
We both ignored her. If there had been any doubts in my mind as to the status of halflings, Nyx had clarified them for me.
Her nasal voice echoed behind us as we walked across the little courtyard and into the Compound. Neither of us spoke until we were safe behind the doors of our shared rooms.
“I’m sorry,” Ryu murmured, pulling me close the minute the lock shot home.
“I know,” I said. “It’s not your fault.”
“But still, that was totally uncalled for. Which I guess is the definition of Nyx, really—‘uncalled for.’ ”
“Don’t worry about it,” I said while shedding my wrap for the final time that night. I climbed into bed, my brain still buzzing but my body suddenly exhausted. “I’m used to uncalled for,” I finished, thinking of Linda and Stuart.
Ryu stripped off his wet clothes and slipped into bed beside me. His skin was chilly, and I gasped as he wrapped himself around me for warmth.
“Sorry,” he mumbled. I forgave him.
I turned over so I was facing him, our noses nearly touching. “That Jakes wasn’t working for Nyx, it’s not good, is it?” I asked, quietly.
Ryu’s eyes closed. When they reopened, he sighed. “No, it’s not.”
I thought of my name on Peter’s master list, underneath the others that had been crossed off. I turned back around, pressing myself up against Ryu’s chest. He tightened his arms around me.
“Jane?” he asked, eventually.
“Yeah?”
“What did you mean when you said you weren’t really you? That there were two Janes?”
I gulped. Way to sound schizo, genius.
“Oh, that? Nothing. Who knows what I meant.”
Ryu didn’t push it, but his body, stiff behind mine, told me he wasn’t happy with my response. So I snuggled back against him, pulling his hands up from my waist to cup my breasts.
“You’ll stay here with me?” I murmured. “Till I’m asleep?”
“Of course,” he murmured, relaxing against me as he kissed the nape of my neck.
Sleep came quickly that night, despite all that had happened—all that I’d seen. But my dreams were dark and I knew that, on the morrow, I would face an even greater challenge.
For I had no doubt the dawn would bring more Alfar intrigue and—worse yet—another pair of Iris’s dreaded high heels.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Standing on the very edge, I eyed the swimming pool with trepidation. I did not want a repeat of last night’s performance. Starring as a crack whore for one night was enough. Did I really offer Ryu sex for swimming? I wondered, again. Thank god I never tried drugs. I’m a public service announcement waiting to happen.
I stretched my leg forward, balancing on the other, and started to dip my toe in before reconsidering: a toe might be too much. Instead, I sat down on the side of the pool, legs crossed beneath me. I cautiously extended my right hand toward the water. I’d start with a finger.
I’d fallen asleep for a few hours the night before, and then at about three in the morning my eyes had pinged open. If I’d been afraid of being hungover from my crack-pool experience, I needn’t have been. I was completely awake and I felt like the Energizer bunny hooked up to a nuclear reactor. Luckily, Ryu was up reading and we managed to find ways to amuse ourselves. He was particularly keen to imitate my behavior after my dip in the Alfar pool, for which I had to discipline him thoroughly. Around six, he switched himself off and succumbed to catatonia, leaving me to fend for myself. I read Ryu’s book—Dostoevsky’s Notes from Underground translated by Pevear and Volokhonsky. It’s one of my all-time favorite reads and the translation was amazing, but my attention was so insanely focused I read it in half the time it should have taken me. Having exhausted Dostoevsky, I took a very long time in the bathroom, mud-masking and shaving and exfoliating and basically trying to kill as much time as possible. Which was difficult, since I was so energetic I was moving at light speed.
When I did emerge from my morning toilette, I was relieved to find Elspeth waiting for me in our little sitting room. She took me down to breakfast and showed me how to get to the swimming pool. My buzzing nerves appreciated the reprieve that her calm presence granted.
Eventually we’d ended up back at my room, and Elspeth had excused herself. I’d decided to put on my swimsuit and try out the crack-pool again, but carefully this time. And here I was.
My index finger hovered right above the surface of the water until, very slowly, I dipped it down so that the water came up to just above my nail. It was like jamming my finger in a light socket—power surged up from the pool, into my arm, and then coursed through my body. I withdrew my hand, feeling like I’d been struck by lightning in reverse. And kind of liking it.
I dipped my finger in again, then a third time. I laughed, feeling the slightest bit giddy but also enjoying the sensation the water gave me even though I had no idea what the feeling meant. I got how everything worked when I was swimming: The ocean filled me with power and I used that power to help me manipulate the ocean. There was a direct relational exchange I understood. But could I use that power outside of the water? I didn’t see why not, in a theoretical sense, but imagining myself producing mage lights or whammying my friends and neighbors with a glamour struck me as ridiculous. I still thought of myself as, fundamentally, the same Jane True that had gone to work over a week ago not knowing anything about the world whose edge I was currently skirting.
Yet so much had happened so quickly and I knew I was not confronting any of it. I was just trying to bluff my way through without contemplating how my life was changing. Because I didn’t want to think about that aspect of this past week—the fact that my life would be changed, but not in any way I could anticipate or control.
But what if it doesn’t? my cynical self queried. You’re going back to Rockabill when this is over, to your dad and your friends and your life. And you know damned well that Ryu isn’t going to give up the excitement of his life in Boston or here at Court to join you. So maybe you’ll just go back home and nothing will have changed. You’ll know this stuff is out here, somewhere, and you’ll feel a little closer to Amy and a little more welcome at the Sty—but what happens if that’s all you get? No membership card to a secret society or special access to a world of excitement, danger, and romance—just memories and some cute, but incredibly impractical, shoes.
I thought about what I’d said to Ryu about there being two Janes. Was that how I imagined the rest of my life? One Jane for Rockabill, and one Jane for outside Rockabill? Cause that strategy sure as hell wasn’t going to solve anything.
I frowned down at my reflection rippling on the surface of the water. Here’s an idea…don’t go there, I thought, as my body used my mental distraction to help itself to a fourth finger dip. My spine vibrated with energy.
I sighed. I really wanted to swim—to feel water on my limbs and to bury my worries in the monotony of physical exertion. But I knew I’d be back to reeling around like a drunken sailor if I dared get in that pool. So instead I stood up and wrapped my towel around my waist. I’d have to find something else to do for the next few hours.
