Guilt pricked Alec. He didn't like the sensation. "Dammit, Kris, she didn't tell me. I thought the marking was due to the amount of blood she'd fed me. I almost drained her dry when she brought me back. I didn't know.... She didn't tell me."
"You've been around long enough to know how women are," his friend answered, standing next to him as they both stared out into the shadowed garden. What Kristoff saw, Alec had no idea - all he could see was the look on Cora's face when she made the verbal slip, and realized she would have to tell him the truth. "There are times when I give up trying to understand Pia. I just accept that some things are important to her that don't mean a damn to me, and let it go at that. What matters to me is that she's happy. I find it interesting, however, that your first concern is for Cora, not Eleanor."
"Eleanor . . ." Alec rubbed his nose as he thought about what to do with the extra Beloved. "She's . . . not needed."
Kristoff gave him a rueful look. "I'm sorry we brought her back. We thought it was the only way that the council would sanction your removal from the Akasha. We should have just let matters lie."
"And left me there? I'd much rather be facing the problem of one too many Beloveds than that. It wasn't at all pleasant."
"No, but I imagine you're none too happy right now, either, faced with both your original Beloved and her reincarnation. What are you going to do about Eleanor ? "
"I have no idea," he said, his shoulders slumping. "I assume since I never even fed from her that she'll be fine picking up a new life as a lich. Our bond, such as it is, is tenuous, and she shouldn't be affected by it being severed. It's Cora who concerns me. She has an aversion to Dark Ones. She saw me kill the reaper." Alec cast his mind back to that horrible day. Odd, though, that the memory now carried with it no pain. After centuries of it causing him the utmost agony, emotion had been drained from the memory, just as if Cora's admission had wiped it all clean. "Sorry, she saw me kill your wife."
Kristoff made a half-shrugging gesture. "Ruth was a reaper. She just didn't mean to run down and decapitate Eleanor."
"No." He knew that now. He hadn't for centuries, but after the last time he tried to kill Kristoff, they had finally worked out what had really happened, and moved past it. "Did I ever apologize for killing her?"
"No, but I never apologized on her behalf for killing your Beloved."
"I never apologized for turning you, either," Alec said moodily, feeling that so long as he was going to lash himself with guilt, he might as well get all of it out at the same time.
"If you hadn't, I wouldn't have found Pia, and she was worth all those centuries I had to wait for her," Kristoff allowed. "I could have done without you planning on destroying her, but since you couldn't see it through, it's all a moot point."
Alec couldn't help but smile at that. "She smote me with that damned reaper light of hers. That was no fun, I can tell you. My chest hair hasn't been the same since."
Kristoff laughed and punched him in the arm. "You had it coming. If Eleanor goes off without giving you any grief, what will you do about Corazon?"
He sighed. "She's my Beloved. What do you think I'm going to do with her? Bind myself to her and spend the rest of our lives convincing her I'm not a murdering bloodsucker. Assuming, that is, no one gets to her first."
Kristoff slid him a curious look. "Gets to her how?"
"I'd tell you, but I believe we're about to have company, and it's probably easier to explain it once rather than twice."
"Have you gentlemen worked through Alec's issues ?" Pia asked, appearing in the doorway, her gaze drawn, as ever, to Kristoff. He held out his hand for her, and she moved immediately to his side, snuggling against him with a private smile meant only for him.
Alec watched them, wondering if Cora would ever cleave to him the way Pia did with Kristoff. "I have no issues. I was just . . . surprised." And hurt, but it wouldn't do to admit that.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you.
He turned to find Cora in the door, her eyes wary. Eavesdropping, querida?
No, she said, startled, and he realized she hadn't picked up his thoughts. I just . . . I figured I must have hurt you when you left like that, and then didn't want to talk to me. You've been put in a bad place, and part of that was due to the fact that I hadn't told you the truth about me. I wanted to tell you about it. I think I probably would have, but then Eleanor was there, and she was your real Beloved, and I figured you'd want her.
I don't.
No, I gathered that. But it didn't seem fair to you to have to choose. I thought I might just make it easier on you by letting Eleanor serve her purpose.
He studied her face for a few seconds, then decided to see what path his life would take. He held out his hand for her, just as Kristoff had done with Pia.
Cora looked at his hand, hesitating. His heart contracted with the pain that accompanied the knowledge that she didn't want him, truly did not want to be his Beloved. He was a convenient end to a means, that was all.
Her hand was warm in his as she moved next to him, one delicious hip pressing against him. Hope flared deep in the empty space where his soul was meant to be, the hope that, after more than five hundred years, he might not be alone any longer.
Pia murmured something about getting some refreshments before they got caught up on all the news, taking Kristoff with her as she left the room. Alec barely noticed them leave, so caught was he in the beauty of Cora's eyes. "Mi corazon," he said, rubbing his thumb down her silky cheek to that lush lower lip that begged to be tasted. "My heart."
"Alec, we need to talk. Eleanor - "
"We will talk to her. I do not want her hurt any more than you do, but she must come to the realization that you are my Beloved, not her."
"I don't know. It seems so heartless, somehow."
"Is your hesitation due to the situation with Eleanor, or that which is between us?" he asked, suddenly worried again. Was he misreading her emotions? She felt guilt with regard to him - that he knew - but whether it was about hiding the fact that she was his Beloved, or for the fact that Eleanor had been upset, was beyond his understanding.
"It's . . . it might be both. I feel like I stole you from Eleanor somehow, even though I know I really didn't. She's me, for heaven's sake. Or a past version of me. So I couldn't steal from myself, could I? And yet it feels like I did, and, Alec, I've never been the 'steal someone else's man' sort of person."
"You didn't steal me, love," he said, amused despite the fact that she was obviously distressed. He wanted to kiss the worry right out of her mind, but knew she had to work things out for herself, or she would never be content to bind herself to him. "We were meant to be together. There's no other explanation for the fact that you saved me in the Akasha."
"You were supposed to help me get out," she said with a dark look. "That's the only reason why I saved you."
"There were others you could have approached for help. That you didn't abandon me after you knew who and what I was tells me that deep down you know we are meant to be, as well."
She sighed, and leaned her head against his shoulder. "Do you have any idea how annoying it is to have your inner devil saying, 'I told you so'? It's almost more than I can bear."
"Inner devil?"
She smiled into his neck. "It's what I call my conscience. She seems more of a little troublemaker than an angelic bit of righteousness meant to keep me on the straight and narrow. She liked you from the start, for one."
He laughed, delighted with the sudden quirky turn of her mind. "Then she has my full approval. Do not distress yourself, Cora. I won't ask anything more from you than what you want to give me."
Her gaze dropped. "What if I don't want to give you anything?"
"Then I will continue on as I have." Only he wouldn't. Thinking over the past few days, he realized they were one short step away from Joining. Although it was physically possible for him to still feed from others, he knew he wouldn't. Somehow, without his being aware of it, this woman had found her way into his heart and bound him to her. But he wouldn't let Cora know that; despite her protests and rather odd ideas about Dark Ones, she had a large heart, and he knew with absolute conviction that she would allow guilt to sway her into Joining rather than a true desire to do so.
"I . . . do I have to make a decision right now?" She wrung her hands.
He smiled, and gave her a quick kiss just because he couldn't resist that delectable mouth, and then gave her a second one because there was no way one was going to be enough. "No. We have all the time in the - "
The door opened. Pia stuck her head in, her face tight with concern. "We have company, and they're looking for you. Kristoff has them in the sitting room, but we need to hide you. Can you find your way to the cellar? There's a hidden door behind some casks of wine. I have to run upstairs and warn Eleanor to keep mum about you, so I don't have time to show you where it is."
Alec nodded. "I know where the hidden room is. I helped Kris clean it out."
"Good. We'll give you the all clear when Julian and his buddy are gone."
"Julian? The messenger?"
"Yes." She said nothing more, leaving them silently.
"Who's the messenger?" Cora asked, prodding him when he opened the door enough to peer out of it.
"He's part of the Moravian Council. Which means they know I'm out, and either know or suspect I've come to Kris for help. Quickly, they've gone into the other room, but I doubt if they'll stay there for long."
He hustled her through the sunlight, ignoring the pain as they headed through the kitchen to a small door, down a rickety flight of stairs, and through a series of musty, dark, close rooms that smelled greatly of the earth. He pulled out a small penlight, flicking it around the rooms to avoid the stacks of old furniture, barrels of wine the previous owner had left, and the usual detritus found in a house a few centuries old.
Cora said nothing as he counted down a line of oak wine casks, handing her the penlight as he gripped a cask with both hands, throwing all his weight against it, willing it to move. It shuddered and groaned for a few seconds before giving way, sliding to the side, revealing a cobwebbed entrance cut low into the stone wall.
"In," he said, kicking the remains of a wooden crate out to cover the marks on the ground where the cask had moved.
"Are there mice? I have a thing about mice," Cora said, her fear palpable.
"If there are, I won't let them near you," he promised.
She gave him a long look. "Do I have to go in there with you? Would the Julian guy know who I am? With regards to you, that is?"
Pain laced him at her words, although he understood her reticence. If it weren't for her, he'd say to hell with the council and face down the messenger. But he no longer had only his own future to consider. "No, he wouldn't. You don't have to go with me if you don't want to. Pia will claim you as a visiting friend, I'm sure."
She looked at him for the count of five before she nodded and ducked down to enter the room.
He smiled at her ass. He couldn't help himself - she was just so contrary at times, it was all he could do to keep from pouncing on her and claiming her right then and there.
The hidden room was more a hole scraped out of the side of the mountain than anything else, the smell in it particularly earthy when he pulled the door closed behind them. Cora scooted to his side, clutching the back of his shirt and peering around suspiciously as he shone the narrow light around the tiny room. There was no sign of rodent life, but his nose told him otherwise.
"Do you see anything?" Cora asked, pressing herself into him.
No. Surely you cannot be scared of a tiny little animal.
"You're kidding, right? Because if there is anything more frightening than little mousy feet and tails and those twitching noses, I don't know what it is. Well, OK, rats are icky, too, but I count them in the mouse category."
"I see nothing," he lied, meeting the beady-eyed, but mildly curious, gaze of a large brown rat that scampered onto a broken chair across the small room.
"OK, but if you do, I'm out of here. It's no reflection on HOLY JESUS!"
Cora screamed and pointed in a direction forty-five degrees from the rat, and proceeded to climb him like he was a ladder.
"You know," he said conversationally, her heaving breasts pressed against his face as she struggled to climb even higher up his body, her heels digging into his hips, "that mouse is probably far more terrified of great big you than you are of it, mousy feet and twitching nose aside."
"Don't let it get near me!" she shrieked.
If you keep doing that, love, Julian will hear you.
Sorry. MOUSE! Can we leave yet? Please?
I don't know, he said, rubbing his cheeks against the thin linen shirt, the scent of her and the feel of her breasts waking his appetite . . . both appetites. I'm rather enjoying this. Except the way your heels are poking into my flesh. Could you . . . thank you.
Sorry. It's just that I really do not like mice.
I've ascertained that fact for myself. Much as I appreciate having my face buried in your breasts, at some point, I'm going to need oxygen.
She pulled back slightly, just enough for him to get some air into his lungs. "Sorry," she repeated softly. "Can you see the mouse?"
He glanced over to the rat. It was cleaning its face, one eye on them. "No, I don't see a mouse. It probably ran when you screamed, and went back into its home."
"You think so? " She shifted, obviously trying to peer into the darkness. "Maybe. Why are you hiding something from me? I've admitted I'm your Beloved - aren't you supposed to let me have a lifetime membership pass into your brain?"
He leaned back against the wall, his hands on her wonderful ass as she tightened her legs around his hips. "Are you giving me complete access to your thoughts and feelings, as well?"
That stopped her. He could feel how disgruntled she was over the thought that he could keep things from her, but knew she couldn't demand he allow her into his mind willy-nilly unless she honored those same terms.
He frowned at that thought. Just what, exactly, did she have to hide from him? "A Beloved should never keep things from her Dark One," he said primly.
"I'll be sure to pass that along to the next Beloved I see. Is your back getting tired?"
"No, although if you slid down a bit, I could at least kiss you. Unless you wish to take off your shirt so I can kiss your bare breasts?"
He felt her thinking that over, but she sighed, instead and cautiously unlocked her legs from their death grip on his hips, slowly lowering herself to the ground.
"Do you mind?" she asked, squeezing between him and the door.
"Not at all. The rat doesn't live who will make it past me to you," he said.
She froze. "RAT? You think there are rats in here?"
Cielito, you're going to pass out if you hyperventilate, and then I'll have to stop guarding you to resuscitate you, and that will leave the path open to the mouse to touch you with its feet.
She screamed into his mind at that thought, but made an effort to breathe. He couldn't help but smile into the darkness at the fact that she thought nothing about facing down one of Bael's wrath demons, but was almost prostrate with terror at the thought of a few rodents.
"Distract me," she ordered his back.
He started to turn, intending on taking her into his arms.
"No, not that way! You have to stand guard. Distract me while you watch for attacking beasts. I suppose we should talk about Eleanor."
"I'd prefer not to."
"I hate to say it, but I'd rather not, as well. What a chicken I am. Tell me . . . tell me about your past. Jas told me that vampires are either born that way or made. Which were you?"
"My father was an unredeemed Dark One; thus I was born that way, as well. What do you want to know about my past?"
"Well . . . how old are you? You look like you're my age, but I have a feeling you're older than you look."
"I was born in 1336 in what is now Dachau, Germany."
"The place where the concentration camp was?"
"Yes. It is a lovely area, despite that blot on its history. I have a summer home there that I think you'll like."
"Do you have any brothers or sisters?"
"None left living. My mother had several children before my father seduced her."
"Sounds like Daddy had some issues."
"Several, not the least of which was an inability to remain with any woman longer than a few weeks. He died in a fire in the eighteenth century."
"Really? I didn't think you guys could die."
"We can be killed, yes. We don't die of natural causes, however, and it's not easy to end our lives, but in my father's case, the building he was in collapsed on him, trapping him in the fire. Even a Dark One cannot stand up to that sort of thing."
"I'm sorry," she said, and he knew she honestly was sorry about the loss of his father.
"Thank you. I was not close to him, but he was my only living family member. I felt his loss." He didn't say more, but she read it in his mind nonetheless.
Her arms went around him, her cheek pressed against his back. After you'd already lost your Beloved. I'm sorry, Alec. Sorry that I wasn't around for you when I should have been.
It wasn't your fault, querida. It was just one of those cruel accidents that fate deals us sometimes. He wanted to add that it would be worth it if he knew he had found his Beloved at last, but he kept his thoughts to himself, wanting her to make the decision for herself and not be swayed by his need.
"What's a lichmaster?"
"Hmm?" Cora's question interrupted his contemplation of how much time they had, and whether he could convince her that the room was mouse-free enough to make love to her. "It's someone who controls liches."
"Like Ulfur?"
"Yes. In fact, it's Ulfur that Kris and Pia are trying to save."
"Ah, is that how you knew who he was?" she asked, snuggling up against his back.
He might be hungry, object to being hidden like he was a criminal, and dislike the closed-in feeling of the small room, but he'd happily stand there to the end of his days to protect Cora, if she continued to rub herself against his back that way. She was so obviously his Beloved, the one woman put on the earth to be with him, he was surprised he hadn't recognized her from the first. "Yes. He was in Pia's charge before de Marco stole his soul and used it to have him resurrected as a lich bound to him."
"Poor guy. Do you think that monk can summon Diamond, too?"
"From the Akasha? No. That would take a Guardian, and unless he has one on call, he wouldn't be able to organize a rescue for your friend."
"Well, I'm going to have to do something about her soon, Alec. She's been in there for some time now, and if nothing else, my ex-husband will be worried about her."
"Time passes differently in the Akasha than here," he said, not liking the feeling of obligation she felt toward the other woman, but aware that it was now his problem, as well. "We will contact the Guardian who summoned us to have her do the same for Diamond."
She pressed her face against the back of his neck, her breath warm on his flesh, sending little rivulets of fire into his veins. "That's got to be expensive."
"It is."
"You'd do that for me?" Her hands slid around his sides, her fingers spreading wide on his belly.
"Of course. You're my - " He stopped, but she knew what he was going to say.
"That's still nice of you. Alec, do you think we could go to a mouse-free room? You're driving me wild with all those thoughts of licking me, and tasting me, and biting me, and oh my god, yes, I really like that one! Can we do that? Right now?"
He laughed, turning to face her, about to say that he would be happy to indulge her every fantasy, but at that moment, the door behind her started to move with a low grating sound.
"It's just me," Kristoff said, heaving the door aside before waving them out. "Julian's gone. You can come out."
"Oh, thank god. There's a mouse in there!" Cora said, giving a visible shudder before hurrying out of the room.
Kristoff looked past Alec to the shadows, where the rat stopped cleaning itself to consider them. "Indeed," was all he said before Alec helped him push the door back into place.
"I assume, since you're not escorting me out in handcuffs, that the messenger didn't convince you to turn me over to them?" Alec asked as they trooped back upstairs.
"Did you think I would?" Kris asked, a smile on his lips.
"It would have been sweet revenge."
"We don't want revenge," Pia said as they entered the same sitting room they had been in earlier. She held out a cup to Cora, plying her with food as the two women sat opposite each other. "We never have. That's why we had Eleanor's remains found and brought back to life. Even before that, we didn't want it. Kristoff spoke on your behalf after the council had you banished, but those new vampires who took Rowan's and Andreas's places on the council are bastards. Well, and that Sebastian guy, who I have never liked."
"He's had a hard time of it. He's still recovering from being tortured by a demon lord," Alec said with a little smile at Cora as he sat next to her on the couch. She ate three ginger cookies rapidly. I'm sorry, love, I didn't know you were hungry, or I would have asked Pia to feed you.
It just kind of hit me when I saw all the goodies. Is that lemon pound cake? It is! I love lemon pound cake!
Alec pushed the plate of cake closer to Cora, who murmured something to Pia before taking two slices.
"Oh, Kristoff told me why Sebastian's such a big pain in the butt, but that doesn't make him any easier to take. Cora, if you like the pound cake, you have to try the cream cheese pinwheels. I get them from a little bakery in town, and they are to die for. I've always said that if you're going to eat for two, you might as well eat what you like. And by 'eat for two' I don't mean I'm having a baby, so you can just put your eyeballs back in, Alec. I meant being responsible for feeding a vamp gives you a bit more license to indulge."
"My eyeballs were in no danger of popping out, thank you," he said drily, leaning back, one arm draped over Cora's shoulders as she and Pia consumed just about every last bit of food. "Where is Eleanor?"
"Still pouting in her bedroom. She had some not very nice things to say about you, which I'm afraid I encouraged."
Cora looked surprised. "Why did you encourage that? "
Pia smiled at them both. "Because she didn't know that Alec wasn't down here, so she was more than happy to stay upstairs and nurse her grudge in private. Which meant she didn't see the messenger."
"What did Julian say?" Alec asked, needing to know the worst. He had to protect Cora from whatever penalty the council would mete out on him.
"The council knows you're out, of course," Kristoff answered, sitting next to Pia on the love seat. "They assume you'll come here. I told them I would tell them if I saw you."
Alec's eyebrows rose. "You lied?"
"Of course. But that's not going to fool them for long, Alec. Julian didn't outright accuse me of having you hidden away, but he did notice your car, and he's not stupid. He'll be back. And when he does . . ." Kristoff's gaze shifted to Cora.
"Why do I have a feeling that what you're not saying is something I'm really going to dislike? " she asked him.
Alec tangled his fingers in her hair, idly stroking her neck as he mulled over the possibilities. "I will have to leave."
"Yes, but that's not the answer," Kristoff said, meeting his gaze with one that spoke volumes. "They'll simply follow you."
"Do they have some sort of special vampire tracking ability?" Cora asked, worry uppermost in her mind. "Will they be able to find you quickly, I mean?"
"Not if I don't wish to be found, no. But Kristoff is correct that they won't give up - they'll continue to track me until they find me and return me to the Akasha."
"Well, don't let them," she said, sounding indignant at the thought. "I went to a lot of trouble to have that Guardian pull you out of there. Maybe if you talked to them - "
Pia and Kristoff were shaking their heads right along with him. "We tried that," Pia said, wiping her fingers on a linen napkin before sitting back. "We talked ourselves blue in the face, but they absolutely would not listen. They maintain that Alec's actions have indirectly caused the deaths of Dark Ones, and that he should pay for that. That's why we resurrected Eleanor."
Cora's shoulders dropped as she leaned into him, delighting his senses with her warm, feminine feel and scent. "Maybe you could hide, then, somewhere that they won't find you."
"It's possible," he said, wondering if she'd consent to shut herself away with him.
"Possible, but not reasonable," Kristoff said, frowning. "They'll find you, Alec."
"There is one solution," Pia said, her hand on Kristoff's leg. She glanced at him before continuing.
"What's that?" Cora asked, and in a flash she knew what Pia would say.
Pia took a deep breath and pinned Cora back with an intense look. "Someone has to Join with Alec. I know you said you didn't want to, but there's really no other way to save him from the Akasha. I'm afraid you're going to have to make a decision, Cora; it's either you or Eleanor. One of you is Alec's only salvation."
