Sascha split off from Lucas as they entered the SnowDancer den. "What did Mercy say?"
"They found what looks like the Alliance's bolt-hole, but the mercenaries are long gone." He thrust a hand through his hair. "We can deal with this before we go down. Mercy's got things under control."
She nodded. "I need to speak to Toby for a few minutes. You go talk to Hawke."
A quiet nod. "I'll back you, whatever you decide. But, kitten, this could be serious."
"I know." She wouldn't make the decision lightly. "Go on."
As he followed the soldier who'd met them at the door, another led her to the schoolroom where Toby was doing math. "I'll be fine now."
Sing-Liu gave a nod. "See you around."
Watching the other woman leave, Sascha was struck by the changes wrought over the last year and a half. The first time she'd come here, Hawke would have never allowed her to wander freely. Even now, she knew there were certain sections where she'd be denied access, but all in all, it was a definite improvement.
Toby's teacher glanced her way right then and, a short conversation later, the boy walked out to meet her in the corridor. "What's the matter?" he asked at once, his E senses telling him she wasn't as calm as she appeared.
"Come with me." She walked him to an empty classroom and, closing the door, took a seat opposite him. "Toby, I need to talk to you about Sienna."
"Oh." She could almost see the struggle in him. "Loyalty's important."
"I know, kiddo." She took his hands. "I don't want you to betray her. I just need the answer to one question." A question Toby could answer better than even the adults in his family.
"Just one?"
"Just one."
"Okay."
She held his gaze. "Does Sienna need help?"
Toby bit his lip and nodded, the movement jerky with emotion. "She's so afraid, Sascha. It's breaking her in here." He fisted a hand and circled it over his chest.
"Oh, baby." Getting up, she knelt down to hug him, stroking her hand over his back. "Have you been trying to help?"
A nod against her, boyish arms holding on tight. "Before, she was afraid but it was okay. I could help her. But now she's all shut up. I can't get the rainbows inside."
"You did good, Toby." He'd no doubt helped Sienna far more than he realized. If the girl was splintering on the psychic plane, having a brother with empathic abilities would've leached off some of the pressure. But now Sienna wasn't allowing even her adored baby brother inside. That meant serious trouble. "Okay, sweetheart, I want you to go back to class and try not to worry."
"Will you help her?" Cardinal eyes looking solemnly into hers.
"I'll try my hardest." She wouldn't lie to him. "But Sienna's stubborn. She'll fight me."
That actually made Toby relax. "Yeah. She's fighty."
Sascha laughed. "That she is."
Dropping Toby back in class, she made her way through the SnowDancer tunnels to Hawke's office. She needed to speak to Sienna, and for that, she'd need Hawke's permission. Which was going to be a hurdle in itself.
Frowning, she stopped, realizing she'd gone completely out of her way. Strange. She knew how to get to Hawke's office, but instead she was heading toward the paintings that lined the entranceway. It would've been logical to turn and put herself back on the right path, but she was no longer in the Net. Logic didn't rule supreme.
Trusting instinct and her growing abilities, she continued on toward the hallway lined with an amazing array of images of wolves at play, at rest, even in combat. She wasn't as surprised as she should've been to see Sienna Lauren at the farthest end of the tunnel - the part closest the door. The teenager's face was stark white, her free hand clenched rigidly enough to hurt. She was running the fingers of the other over what looked like some kind of a fracture in the wall.
"Sienna." Sascha kept her tone soft, able to sense the distress coming off the girl in waves. It was the first time she'd seen her this close to breaking. Sienna had turned eighteen that summer, but except for her run-ins with Hawke, she acted with a maturity beyond her years - unsurprising, given what Sascha suspected of Sienna's abilities. The girl's training had to have been brutal. "Sienna," she said again, putting a hand on the girl's shoulder.
Sienna jerked away from the wall. "I didn't mean to." On the surface, it was an angry declaration. "I didn't, Sascha."
Sascha wasn't close to Sienna, but she was coming to realize that as an empath, she had a shortcut to people's trust. It was a responsibility she intended to honor . . . no matter what. "It's okay," she began, trying to soothe.
"No," Sienna interrupted. "Hawke will go crazy." There was no fear in her, just a staggering sense of having done something bad. Something very bad.
Hawke? Sascha frowned, then looked at the wall. The fracture, the crumbled paint. "You did this?" she asked with utmost gentleness, taking the girl's hands in her own and turning them over - powdered stone clung to her skin.
"I didn't mean to," she said again. "I only wanted to look at them - they're important to Hawke. I - " Her voice hitched, her breath broke. "My emotions are going haywire, Sascha. And without control, I can't - " She cried out, wrenched her hands away. A second later, power filled the air. It was so strong, it raised the hairs on the back of Sascha's neck.
Fear threatened to take over but she stood her ground. Panicking would just make it worse. Everything about Sienna pointed to a combat ability - which one, Sascha wasn't sure, but one thing was certain - such Psy were very, very, very unstable until trained. Before Silence, many on the extreme end of the scale had died when their powers turned on them. "Sienna," she said, drawing the girl's attention. "Look at me." She infused her voice with command, made the girl meet her eyes. "Focus."
Sienna blinked eyes that had gone inky black, drowning the white stars, and nodded in an uncoordinated jolting motion. A minute later, her hands uncurled and the sense of power disappeared. Both of them breathed a sigh of relief. A single, clear tear escaped Sienna's phenomenal control. Her heart twisting up, Sascha gathered the teenager close. "Shh, we'll figure this out."
"I'm the horror in the closet, Sascha, the nightmare even Psy hide from." She held on tight, her face pressed to Sascha's shoulder.
"Don't be melodramatic." Sascha couldn't believe the pain contained in the fragile body she held. Sienna's emotions were so tormented the girl was close to shattering. It made no sense, not when she had to have been fully conditioned before she left the PsyNet. "You have combat-grade abilities. It's not limited to mental combat, is it?"
A shake of the head. "No."
Sascha had the sense that Sienna was hiding the whole truth, but now wasn't the time to push. "Your uncle has extremely powerful abilities - he's learned to control them. So will you." Judd's stated ability was telepathy, but Sascha had a feeling that that was a front for other, deadlier gifts. The man had been an Arrow, an assassin no one ever saw until it was too late.
"I'm not like Uncle Judd." A flat statement. "I'm worse." No more tears, no weakness in that voice, only a truth so painful no one should have to endure it. "You know it and so do I. One slip and boom, I take out the entire den."
Sascha knew that wasn't teenage grandeur at work. "Your cardinal status isn't telepathy, is it?" As with Judd, that was the skill everyone knew her to have.
A pause. The answer was less than a whisper. "No."
My God. Sascha held the girl closer, disbelieving. Cardinal Psy with furious combat abilities were beyond deadly. Sienna could possibly take out the SnowDancer den if she lost her grip on her powers. "You've been trying to manage it?"
"I shut up everything inside. Everything." Words ground out through clenched teeth. "I thought if I could hold it, just hold it, it would be fine. But it's not."
"Why?" she asked. "Why are you losing control this badly?"
The answer, when it came, broke Sascha's heart.
"Hawke." It was an almost soundless whisper.
"Oh, Sienna." She stroked her hand over the girl's hair, even as her mind worked at piercing speed. "Has it been cumulative?"
Sienna nodded. "The second I met him, everything crumbled, my shields, my conditioning, everything! And Sascha, I need that conditioning. Judd showed me how to short-circuit the pain controls but I haven't - I'm not like him, I don't think I can stop without the pain."
Sascha squeezed her eyes shut, sending Sienna soothing waves of reassurance. But she didn't brush aside the girl's words. Silence had been undertaken for a reason. It had become perverted over time, but at the start, the Protocol had been their salvation - it had saved people like Sienna, Psy who couldn't think for the virulent strength of their gifts. It was possible the girl simply couldn't exist without Silence.
And if that was so, it would send shock waves through both the Lauren family and the SnowDancers.
"The LaurenNet," she said, referring to the small psychic network that linked Sienna's entire family, "is it strong enough to survive your not being in the den?"
Sienna nodded immediately. "Marlee and Toby are settled. They won't attempt to rejoin the PsyNet. And with Brenna in our net as well, it's gained in strength. But I can't leave for long - maybe a week or two. Toby's my responsibility."
"Of course," Sascha said. "But you need a break, you know that. And we're close enough that someone can drive you up here when necessary."
"I can drive. Uncle Walker taught me." A pause, then a slight shake of her head. "But these eyes, Sascha. We can't hide them."
